Written by: Kang Ogenk
Even when we lose, we still love the national team. But that motivational line feels empty now. Failed again. Even with a squad full of naturalized players. What can you do? This is football. John Herdman’s team: total failure. Read the story while sipping your kopdud, ki aki !!! (coffee + cigarette, old man)
Jalan Besar Stadium was no longer a stadium. It had turned into a duel arena between two nations who had both lost their sanity. Garuda came with one mission: must win. Singapore only needed a draw. Simple? No. This is football, where logic often gets kicked farther than the ball.
First Half
Garuda went on the attack immediately. At home, fans had already prepared coffee and fried bananas, plus a backup heart. After just a few minutes, Mitchell Lee Baker almost scored past Mohamad Izwan bin Mahbud, but a Singapore defender cleared it. The Indonesian fans screamed so loud the Merlion statue nearly migrated to Batam.
In the 20th minute, Baker was taken down in the penalty box. Should’ve been a penalty, but referee Al-Amouri from Oman didn’t budge. Fans yelled, “That’s a penalty. Are you blind?!” They called for VAR. The referee’s ears were apparently on airplane mode.
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| Indonesia vs Singapore: Playout entertaining 1-1 draw. Photo: The Jakarta Post |
23rd minute, Cahya Supriadi made a brilliant save. Fans clapped so hard their coffee cups shook. Singapore kept attacking, but the wall of Dony Pamungkas, Rizky Ridho, Shayne Pattynama, and Wahyu Prasetyo held firm like barbed wire.
In the 29th minute, Baker was brought down in the box again. The whistle stayed silent. Fans got hotter. “The ref’s been bribed!”
34th minute, Thom Haye got a free kick, but the ball went wide. Fans who had stood up had to sit back down with the face of someone who just lost their Wi-Fi password.
43rd minute, Song made a hard tackle and got a yellow. “Go play tarkam!” fans shouted.
45th minute, Ivar Jenner’s shot was blocked for a corner. The first half ended 0-0. Singapore smiled slightly. Indonesians started biting their nails.
In the locker room, John Herdman suddenly turned into Mario Teguh. “You guys are amazing. You’d be even more amazing if you won. Come on, boys!”
In the Singapore camp, Gavin Lee gave a sermon: “We only need a draw. Don’t get careless.”
Second Half
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| Indonesia vs. Singapore: drew 1-1 |
The archipelago exploded. Fans jumped so hard gravity considered resigning. Some hugged the TV, kissed the flag, and screamed until aliens in orbit thought Earth was under attack. A NASA satellite spying on Xi Jinping even stopped moving. “Wait, what’s this?”
Corrupt prisoners yelled from behind bars too. Their nationalism was no less than a masked mass organization.
In Singapore, fans froze. Marina Bay Sands seemed to hold its breath.
58th minute, Ivar Jenner and Ui-Young Song got into a shoving match. Song was initially shown red and Jenner yellow. Then Al-Amouri stared at VAR for so long, like he was watching episode 147 of a soap opera. All cards were canceled. Indonesian fans erupted again, “Boooh!”
Then disaster struck. Chaos in front of Indonesia’s goal. A loose ball fell to Ilhan Fandi. One shot, and Cahya’s net was breached as the keeper fell. Singapore goal!
This time Singapore went wild. Their fans screamed like they’d just found a national treasure. The MRT probably went into shock. The Merlion roared all the way to Batam, while Indonesian fans instantly turned to statues. If the aliens were shocked before, now they were probably calling home: “Earth is crazier than our reports said.”
The match ended 1-1. Singapore is through to the semifinals. Garuda collapsed.
Indonesian fans went home carrying disappointment…
Sad, ki aki.
🙏🏻 That’s it 🤣
